


Lily Evans Potter's Whirlwind Son

by Opinion8ted



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: ADHD experience, Does that tag count if 'others' is his parents?, Family Feels, Gen, Harry Potter Has ADHD, Harry Potter was Raised by Other(s), I hope this is cathartic for people, It has been for me, James Potter & Lily Evans Potter Live, Slice of Life, This fic is really just me working through my ADHD, and giving adhd the parenting they deserve
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:20:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25029175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Opinion8ted/pseuds/Opinion8ted
Summary: This is a collection a slice of life style one-shots about Harry growing up with ADHD and parents who love and support him. It's mostly based on my experience of growing up with ADHD so don't take it as a universal description of what ADHD is like because everybody experiences it differently. Also some of the positivity in this fic might be a bit unrealistic, I tried not to get too idealistic but ADHD life is so hard so I wanted to write something that was uplifting and could provide comfort for those of us who've had bad experiences.From a non ADHD stand point, this fic is about Lily and James Potter raising their ridiculous son, and will include things like first day of school, and getting into mischief and making friends in the halfblood community. Also stuff about like wizard society and the halfblood life.If anybody is reading this and thinking "this is me" feel free  to come chat with me and ask questions. I can even hook you up with a disccord server for support.You can either comment or reach me at:My main tumblr here: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/verystarlikeMy adhd/nerd tumblr here: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/talknerdy-itsverystarlike
Relationships: Harry Potter & James Potter, Harry Potter & Lily Evans Potter, James Potter/Lily Evans Potter
Comments: 6
Kudos: 58





	1. Chapter 1

The decision to send Harry to muggle school was a hard one, there were so many things they'd had to consider. Should they homeschool him? Should they get him a formal magical education? Would muggle school even suit him?

There is no magical primary school. The wizarding world thought themselves above muggle curriculum, and technically underage children aren't supposed to practice magic, so in the eyes of the ministry there was no purpose. Of course, this is bullshit and purebloods just teach their children themselves or in small exclusive groups. When Lily first started Hogwarts, she'd been surprised by how much the blatant discrimination had hurt. She had memories of being eleven years old and for the first time in her life struggling to keep up with her cohort. She remembers how far behind so many of the Gryffindor's were when compared to the Slytherins, or even herself and Remus in comparison to James and Sirius.

There is so much more to education than school. So many things that you learn just from being around people who've done it all before. There were basic spells not taught at Hogwarts because for those who were surrounded by magic to be taught them would be an insult. Like learning English, magic has so many conventions like syntax and word order that isn't taught explicitly but that people just pick up on by exposure. For muggleborns this means that they often find themselves stumbling on invisible obstacles, clumsy for unnameable reasons.

All this meant that part of Lily thought that a magical education was the way to go. It wasn't the fair or just option but letting Harry suffer needlessly wouldn't change inequity. She has vague plans to do something about it all, but their was a reason she didn't get a job at the ministry bureaucracy and Lily Potter just didn’t' mix. She should still try, she knows Frank and Alice would have benefited from somewhere to send Neville that wasn't going to send them broke or drive him mad.

  
In the end they decided to send Harry to a small muggle school. Simply because Lily thought that Harry would benefit from things like math and inquiry projects that would teach Harry how to organise his thoughts and how to be curious. She also figured that a few friends he wasn't distantly related too might help.

The school they decide to send him to has small class sizes and when Lily met with the teachers she find them kind and welcoming. The school they send him to is the kind of school that might be described as progressive, or freakish if you listened to Petunia, but Lily liked that it was all bright colours and the walls were filled with art. James liked that despite the schools limited numbers they still had an oval and plenty of play equipment.

Mornings in the Potter households are something of a comedic affair. James is in charge of breakfast, because he and Harry are prone to distract each other. Lily almost always trips on the array of toys that Harry likes to artfully display on his floor. Harry likes to dress himself, which Lily approves of because independence is important, but also means she needs to set an earlier alarm as Harry frequently needs to re-button his mismatched shirt, frantically trawl through his entire bedroom to find his jumper, and then put his pants on twice because he put them on backwards the first time. Of course, Lily is exaggerating, none of these things happen every morning, and they very rarely happen all at the same time, but sometimes Lily frets about her whirlwind son.

They have a picture of Harry's first day. They took it in their garden before they left. The Harry in the photo doesn't looked prepared for school in the slightest, despite Lily and James' best efforts he has bed hair, a rumpled shirt and mismatched socks. Really, with Lily and James for parents, Harry was always at least a little bit doomed to be a bit of a rugrat.

They let the parents stay a bit of the first day of class, to help with the separation anxiety. Lily appreciates it, and she thinks that Harry just about dies from happiness when sees all the activities set out on the table. She can only laugh when he and James set about the serious task of decided whether play dough, Lego or colouring-in should take first priority.


	2. Sensory Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry is a quirky kid. Sometimes his greatest enemy is his itchy pajamas or his 'squidgey' food, but it's nothing Lily and James can't handle.

**Disclaimer:** when Lily says hugs are a cure-all I'm not at all trying to imply that all the problems associated with adhd are magically solved by hugs, or that it works for every kid, but a big part of adhd is stimulation problems and there been studies that say hugs can really help when they're overwhelmed. Mostly I personally find hugs really therapeutic and just wanted to write a fic where the adhd kid got hugs instead of being yelled at.

Harry had a thing, For a while they didn't really know what to call it, but it was a bunch of quirks that seemed related but they weren't sure how. Sometimes people would tell Lily in a saccarchine sweet voice, "he's a very sensitive boy." The term grated on her nerves. It didn't sound right, it didn't seem to fit. She doesn't go around calling other people's kids 'special' when they shove dirt in their mouth, or 'slow' because they're behind Harry in their reading.

\---

**Sounds**

There is no big revelations about Harry's quicks. He's there first child so they have nothing to compare it to but they're always noticed he was a bit odd. Lily supposes he was what you might call a fussy baby but again that word didn't really seem to fit. He'd go to sleep okay, but he'd wake up at the drop of a hat. Literally, Remus had dropped his hat outside Harry's room and almost immediately the charms had alerted them of Harry waking up. It wouldn't have been that much of an issue, except once Harry had woken up, he was up. It would always take them a really long time to get him to calm. He was just so…. Sensitive, Lily supposes that's the right word in this context. He was sensitive to even the slightest noise. After many sleepless nights James, Remus, Sirius and her had designed a one way silencing charm.

As he grew older they would realised that not casting a silencing charm was practically beginning Harry to hear a conversation. Somehow he would hear even the slightest whisper of his name from the other end of the house. He never went out of the way to eaves-drop, he didn't need to, he could hear most conversations as clear as day form almost any room in the house.

\---

**Touch**

Harry has odd battles with fabrics. The first couple of times he complained that his sheets or his blankets were itchy, Lily had assumed they just needed a wash. She'd briefly considered that he might have an allergy, but as far as she knew allergies were a constant thing, and Harry's fabric issues seemed to follow no rhyme or reason. For whatever reason, it seems to be fairly common for toddlers to run around naked, but Harry took a 'give me liberty or give me death approach' to clothing far later in life and with far more earnest than she'd ever heard. She didn't think he was messing with her, she doubted that her five year old son had developed the malice or the cunning to devise such a creative approach to driving her mad, but she couldn't for the life of her figure out why intermittently Harry would insist every item of clothing in the house was 'too itchy.' Eventually she and James developed a list of coping strategies, sometimes Harry was just restless and needed to calm down so James chased him around the house, after some trial and error they found Harry's least offensive clothing items and a fabric softener he really liked, sometimes he needed a shower. Somewhat unexpectedly hugs seemed to be the most effective solution to almost any situation that caused Harry distressed. For what-ever reason hugs seemed to be a cure-all, whether it be a hysterical Harry, or an itchy Harry, or an angry Harry. Lily and James didn't completely know why, but they'd learnt not to question everybody wins situations. 

Ironically, it became more of a problem as Harry got older. Not because Harry became more reactive or itchy more frequently, quite the opposite really. It became more of problem because Harry stopped coming to them about these things, so when Harry went to bed and suddenly found that he couldn't bear his pajamas or his sheets or his blankets, instead of letting his parents fix it he'd toss and turn and be exhausted the next morning. She doesn't really know how Harry got it into his head that he had to deal with these things himself, or why he thought he couldn't bother her, but she tries desperately to remedy it. They never quite convince him to seek them out for hugs, something about them needing sleep to (as if knowing her son might be up half the night restless and distressed would help her sleep) but he does let them teach him all the spells, and they set up a silencing charm on the bathroom so he can shower in the morning (with safety wards so he doesn't drown whilst they can't hear him).

\---

**Texture**

Harry also has a food thing. Sometimes when his food is the wrong texture "mom it's too squidgy," he physically gags. The first time this happens Lily thinks it's a case of bad table manners, but the second time she catches his expression. Harry's face is screwed up in concentration like he's trying desperately not to react and ultimately he elects to go to bed without eating. That last bit is what solidifies for Lily that this is more than her kid not liking food, at this point Harry is growing like a weed and constantly hungry so the avoidance of food means something must really be up.

She discusses it with James and they have a conversation with Harry about it one night at dinner. Lily would prefer to have this conversation on the couch, but they've realised sitting Harry down for any kind of 'talk' immediately puts him on the defensive, so casual dinnertime conversation are the way to go.

When she asks him about last night's dinner at first his face screws up, his shoulders tense and he insists that he wasn't hungry, but when Lily assures him that they won't be offended if he didn't like it, his shoulders come relax and the truth comes out. "I just, it was squidgy, I hate it when food is squidgy."

When James prods further about what kind of food is squidgy Harry perks up and starts listing them on his fingers, "mushy peas, leftover roast carrots, pumpkin soup, raw tomatoes," the list goes. There's now ay that they'll ever remember everything that sets him off but they tell him he doesn't have to eat anything that makes him feel that way and from then on Harry is content to just pick out the stuff he doesn't want to eat. The only real problem is salad dressings and sauces because they're hard to remove but they just make sure to save some for him before they dress it.

It's nice because once they discuss this dinnertimes get happier again. For a while Harry would get sullen and evasive, but now he happily chats about his day whilst he picks out the onions from his salad.

\---

**Touch**

Harry also has a touch thing. It's odd because when Harry seeks them out it's like he's an octopus. She has many fond memories of a tiny Harry clinging to James' leg forcing him to walk unevenly due to Harry's weight. When Harry's trying to avoid bedtime he'll snuggle into her side and demand a story because he knows she's a sucker for cuddles. He always threw himself at his god parents, whenever he saw them, happily chatting to Sirius as he was swung onto his shoulders, giving Remus post-full moon comfort.

Harry was on the whole, a very affectionate boy. So it through her loop when at yule parties and the like he would shy away from affections. At first she thought he was embarrassed but he didn't seem at all self-conscious when he hoisted himself into Sirius' lap at dinner, gushing about all the pretty clothes people were wearing. If he wasn't self conscious then why did he squirm when Marlene went to give him a hug, or Albus went to pat his shoulder? Then she thought it was a fear of strangers, but when Minerva got a bit emotional, as she always did at Yule because it brought up memories of her family Harry asked her if she'd like a hug, and was content when it was accepted.

She finally realises exactly what it is and Harry's 6th birthday party. The Weasleys, being the Weasleys, are an affectionate lot, so when they arrive Molly is quick to offer Harry a birthday hug, Lily watches with narrowed eyes as Harry tenses but smiles and thanks her all the same. She watches as this process is repeated with almost every single one of Harry's guests. Then, when it comes to Neville and Luna, two of Harry's closet friends (bar Ron Weasley of course,) they hand Harry his presents and wait a beat. Lily isn't sure exactly what they're waiting for until harry wraps them in a hug.

She scans her mind and realises that whilst Harry is happy to initiate touch he can get overwhelmed when somebody else initiates. She also realises that harry always asks permission before he hugs somebody else. Not when it's James, Remus, Sirius or herself, but when it's anybody else.

They have another of their dinner time conversations and work out that if people ask permission, it gives Harry the opportunity to initiate contact himself, even if it's somebody else's idea. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Most of this is based off personal experience, bedsheets and tags on pajamas gave me hell, I hated feeling confronted. Most of the remedy's though are based on things I read or discovered myself, my parents didn't really take me seriously when I complained about this stuff, I got the you're just sensitive treatment. The thing about asking permission for hugs is based off my sister not me so apologies if I didn't get it quite write, but I do get weird about touch just because of the sensory overload. There's quite a lot of overlap between autism and adhd so if you're autistic and relating to this that's totally valid (or even if you haven't got any diagnosis) . If you haven't experienced the wonder of the tumblr neurodivergent community, there's a really nice general understanding of solidarity between the adhd and autistic community so wlecome to the club :)
> 
> If anybody is reading this and thinking "this is me" feel free to come chat with me and ask questions. I can even hook you up with a disccord server for support.
> 
> You can either comment or reach me at:  
> My main tumblr here: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/verystarlike  
> My adhd/nerd tumblr here: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/talknerdy-itsverystarlike

**Author's Note:**

> Basically for me this chapter was about how for ages I would literally be incapable of getting ready to school. Beyond the point that was normal (once I forgot to wear underwear under my stockings) and it messed with my self-esteemed. When I was like 11 my male teacher said I looked like a drowned rat and I almost died. I don't want to make assumptions but I feel like it would probably be a bigger issue for girls than boys just because it's kind of more accepted that boys will have their shirts un-tucked and grassy knees and messy hair, so I didn't want to include too much in this, But the thing about the photo was relevant as well because my mother used to knit-pick a lot about how I looked in photos and now I literally hate photos but in this fic Lily is like nah, this is my son at his realist and best. Anyway if any of you are adhders and want to vent hit me up.  
> This is my main tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/verystarlike  
> and this is my adhd one: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/talknerdy-itsverystarlike


End file.
